start struggeling crazy money eating life is shit and many ore but thats is the ways to wake me up and try to love my surroundings.

OMG! sedar atau tidak.im only have about a month to finish out all my task.i dont know where to start.all is about money !money!money!!!!!!! then how? where to get it?how to get it?and whyyyyy????? those who dont know,they wont understand and never try to.but im very thankful to have this very understanding family...a lots of thanks to my older brother and sister that support me and also not forget to my love one.i realy hope that my sister not read this blog but if you are reading now plese!!!!!acting like you are not.hahahah!tolonglah kak ida. im tired and sick of all this.im tired to study,im tired of all.very tired.! works come never stop.BEBAN!actually its not realy about my work its actually about my parents.i know they realy loves their child and want to give the best they can but plese mom....dad....harte boleh cari.x pyh la susah2 nak kompolkan harta untuk kami....tp tolong la jage ape yg ade skarang ni....xnk tulis panjang2...cukup sekadar mintak utk difahami......kalau duit tu simpan untuk yg lbh penting kan bgus.x pyh susahkan adik bradik lain......malu sbnarny,...tau msing2 ade tgungan.tp ap blh buat aq x kje pn lgi..insyaallah kalau pnjang umur aq akn cube bantu yg terdaya.usaha mcm yg semua pnah buat utk aq...tak tau lah nak kate....mak abah....tolonglah!

selangkah lagi.....

alhamdulillah....finally...segale persiapan untk sekali lg melangkah ke uitm tepapi kali ni sbg seorang student sarjana muda plak...huhu....alhamdulillah x sangke dpat sampai ke tahap ni...aq x pnah pn membayangkan yg aq akan sampai ke tahap ni..huhu...yg lg lawak..x pnah terbayang pn...hurm...kehidupan kota..mcm mane agaknye ye...huhu...tkt pn ade..tp xpe..kalau niat kite baik...baiklah jdinye btl x?...sem ni x dapat ptptn...sedey la...terpakse la pg baitulmal,yayasan perak p cri bantuan...selain tu amek upah menjahit...mcm ni la kehidupan kan..x sangke dulu kawan2 selalu cakap,buat ape study banyak2 subjek tambahan....wt susah je...tp aq pnah cakap..ersusah2 dulu bersenang kemudian...huhu n skarang sekali lg aq gunekan kate2 tu untuk terus bg semangat pd diri sendiri..lgipon tuhan xkan hampakan hambanya yg selalu berusaha....sebelum ni aq x pnah nampak pn sume ni..aq buat je..aq main redah je..aq x pnah pn fikir yg aq bagus..tp x sangka ade yg nampak usaha aq...kat sekolah dulu aq pemegang rekod top 5 best student,aq pn x tau pasal tu sampai la satu hati ade seorang cikgu dtg..dy tanye..hey,you ni shahdatunadia kan..aq pn jwb la ye...pastu dy cakap..you ni betuah la...x sangke result you bgus...aq tekejut beruk lah...huhuhu...aq ni keje sekolah pn jarang hantar....hahahah...mungkin ni berkat doa seorang ibu dan bape...syukur aq di lahirkan dlm keluarga ni...munhkin ni jgk nasib aq..tp kan,..aq ni buat sesuatu cume bile aq rase aq nak dan baik utk aq je..x pnah pn aq pk untuk jd terkenal,utk di hargai jauh sekali nak menunjuk...aq main suke2 je...tp syukur..semuenye menjadi....tu la kan...tuah ayam nampak di kaki tuah manusia sape tau..harini aq kne pg shah alam sbb nak tgk rumah baru...wink2...huhuhuhu
harap2 housemate ok...kalau boleh nak yg biase2 je...x ligat sgt..kalau blh la...tp kalau dapat jgk nak wat mcm mane..kne kuatkan iman la..huhuhuhu....surat2 sume dah siap..pendaftaran online dah buat,surat tawaran dah amek..nasib baik blh amek kat uitm tapah je..kalau x mati la nak kne p sri iskandar plak..mcm mane la blh lupe nak save..sekali x sempat nak print dah tutup linknye..padan muke aq..huhuhuhu...sekarang ni ade satu je lg yg belum selesai....mdical ckup..lpas tu jom kite ramai2 berlepas ke shah alam...

finally!!its over....

im now in my hometown....just like a dream comes true...im waiting this for a long time...hehehehe..im not longger in "penjara pasir"..im just facing with my omplecated life....and now......its ovwr.....huhuhuhuhuhuhu..thankfull to allah that help and giving me a right ways to fae with my hrble dlly life...all my pryes now is "makbul"..im still rmember my mothers says...if we remember him,he will always remember us....now...nthing to worrd about...dont stop prays prays and prays..may god bless us....

cerita cerita dan banyak cerita!

hurm....i just dont know how to start...facing with a lot of problem  ....huh...plastic plastic plastic...should i be a plastic.....acting like shes the best one,but in deep .....busuk mcm bangkai tikus.....

its about life....

i dont know what im thinking....some times i feel like life is just so plastic!!!
seems a good person infrnt,but not at back....such a freak..i dont know what was in their mind,but......hurmm....did im to prnoid...did im to much....did im wrong....what was im doing till they act like tuutttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im just like an alien ..did im do wrong?why...why it was so many plastic people around me....im standing hear just as a "hamba ALLAH" that wanted a happy and peaceful life...but what i just get is...i dont know how to dscribe those in words...so speechless.....but im still thankful to allah because trust to me to being khalifah in this earth..still give me a ....i dont know,but maybe a test to make me be a though person...to gain my "keimanan" to him....subhanallah.....plese give me a strgh....plese give me a strigh way to face my future...plese make me to be a thankful person ya allah.ya allah,im bagging you ya allah,dont make me to be like  munafik person,get me away from the bad soul.....amin...amin ya robbal alamin..

cuti sem yg melampau....

anak harunnnn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!cuti sem kali ni 3 minggu je..apekejadahny smue ini....sedih kot...hai la nasib......adoiai...diorang ni kalau stakat nk bg 3 mgu je cuti baik jgn bg...sambung je trus smpai 5 sem..bio x pyah balik trus..nak juge bio aq trsikse...apekejadahny....haii...dah cukup sabo dah aq ngan kerenah ni..balik2 kmi student jgk yg jd testimoni...x sian ke kt ktorang......bagai nak senak jantung aq ni siapkan keje...esment 2 mgu jd sminggu..maut aq nak ngejo...haiii....sakit otak la aq ..............kalau la melukis ni 5 mnt blh siap ok jgk....ni stu drwing pn dah bpe jam...sendi tgn aq pndah naik longgarrr...x tau ap nak jd dah..kkkuuuuusuuttttttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

kesilapan silam..

dlm ksunyian malam ni....tringat pulak kat mak dgn abah..jauhnye diorang dri aq..ape la yg diorang buat skarang ni...tgk ndustan kot..hahahaha...sedar atau x...dah lame mase brlalu..dah hampir setahun aq kat kelantan ni..huhu...3 sem lg grad la...umur pn dah mningkat...mak abah pn dah tue..sempat ke aq nak balas budi diorang...dari mude sampai la ke tue....keje siang malam...cri duit utk anak2...dulu muke tegang je...sekarang dah nampak dah kedut2nye....sayu ble ppandang diorang..bia kadang2 sakit hati dgn tutur katenye..tp..bile d fikir balik...mampu ke kte nak marah,layak ke diri kte nak menghine mereke?sape je kte ni...x terbalas semue pengorbanan diorang...xkan dik kerane teguran tu kte nak terase...ble aq fikir balik....agakny terampun ke kesilapan aq pade diorang...betape hebatnye seorang ibu,sanggup bergadai nyawe untuk anak2..adekah setimpal dgn ape yg kte pulangkan pade die...layak ke kte d gelar anak kalau kte sendiri sanggup buat ibu menangis...dulu..x penah aq terfikir bende ni..tp skarang...kalau lah d beri peluang untuk aq blik ke mase lalu..akan aq turut smue perintah die...mak..dulu yg cantik,sekarang dah bekedut dah,,,sanggup hidup susah dmi anak2,dulu kulit mulus,,dmi anak2 die sanggup pg keje sampai hitam,kasar jari jemari,pnat lelah x penah d ungkit,,tp apekah balasan kte pade seorang mak?cume seorang,...satu2nye ibu...xde due..xde tge..xkan la sebab sikit kesalahan kte nak benci dy..egonye seorang anakk..anak yg lahir dri badannye sndri.....dri sebodoh2 manusie dy didik sampai la kte knal erti kehidupan...tpi..kte x penah cri kebaikan die....malah kebusukan dy jgak yg kte pertikai...sapelah kte nak ucapkan keburukan ibu...ya allah.......sempat ke aq memohon ampun pade mereke...sempat ke aq pandang raut wajah mereke lg..mate yg sayu....senyuman yg terukir d wajah x kala anak itu lahir ke bumi,,dapatkah aq lihat lg senyuman semanis itu....kenape bru hari ni aq terfikir....abah....yg dulunye gagah,,,sanggup x beganti baju demi anak2 .....punye la susah,...kongsi sepinggan nasi dgn mak,janji anak2 kenyang,,sanggup berjauhan dgn isteri dmi kesenangan anak2..tp..adekah ianye same spt ape yg kte bri..sebesar itukah pengorbanan kte pade dy...ble balik..tgk abah tdo ...tedetik kat hati ni...tue dah abah aq..pnuh dah kedut kat dahi tu....dri mude sampai tue...x pnah merungut mintak kesenangan dari anak2...x pnah mintak ape2 pn......betape mulienye seorang bape....tpi..mampu ke aq bgi kesenangan pade diorang pulak....ya allah....bantulah aq berjaye ....supaye tebalas pnat lelah diorang selame ni.,...rindunye aq pade diorang..manusia hebat begelar ibu bape....